When I saw this picture of Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, I immediately thought “hubba, hubba” and then I was promptly horrified. To understand why I was shocked by my own reaction, you have to remember that I grew up when the Cold War was still a go. While I don’t live in Osgiliath and therefore can’t see Mordor from my house, the presence of our ominious neighbor was always with us. Hobbiton was actually a second strike target due to the extra-long airport at the nearby Gwaihir Air Force Base. [The extra-long airport means that fighters with nuclear missiles could land and take off or so I was told. The Gwaihir airport is also an alternative landing strip for the space shuttle. The shuttle has yet to land there, but I keep hoping].
Back to the special horror, in my day, Soviet Russia was run by old guys in heavily decorated uniforms or ill-fitting dark suits who–and this is important—KEPT THEIR CLOTHES ON at all times. When I saw pictures of Leonid Brezhnev, I didn’t say “whoa, he’s a hottie”, I said “is he alive or have they just reanimated his corpse?”
What is the world coming to, darn it?! Are we going to be trading military parades in Red Square for pose-offs across the Bering Strait? Are we going to have to oil up the President so he can flex his American biceps on Nome’s beach? Fortunately, we are in the Obama years and therefore can make a respectable showing in the “Shirtless World Leader” department. Although I would have to caution the President that the mosquitos on the Seward Peninsula are more bloodthirsty than right wing protesters at a health care forum so if he’s going to grease up with anything, it should probably be mosquito repellent.
Okay, Obama and Putin make for some major eyecandy, but it can’t end well. Sooner or later other world leaders are going to want to get in on the act and then …well, let’s just say that if North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il starts stripping to the waist, a lot of innocent people are going to have to claw out their own eyes.